Writer Henry Miller once wrote, “If we are always arriving and departing it is also true that we are eternally anchored. One’s destination is never a place but rather a new way of looking at things.”
How we view and judge the world is often rooted deep in our own culture and we base our experiences based on our own personal journey and that view changes with each place you travel to. This week, Christine Hassler explores the easiest way to make a big difference – and it’s a lot easier than you may think. Check it out.
Guest Blog Post by Christine Hassler
One of the greatest human desires is to make a difference and a meaningful contribution to the world. We want to feel like we matter.
Our ego tries to convince us that the best way to do this is by doing something “big” like having an incredible career, starting a non-profit, leading a movement, inspiring others or creating some measurable change in the world.
But our soul knows better . . .
Our soul knows that the greatest way to make the biggest impact is very simple and doesn’t take any doing at all. We make a difference when we see through eyes of love rather than through eyes of judgment. The more we see this way, the more likely we are to be seen through eyes of love by ourselves and others. And when judgment is gone and love is all that remains it is easy to KNOW we matter.
I was reminded of the impactful power of seeing through judgment-free eyes at a recent event. During the cocktail hour I was chatting it up with friends while appetizers were passed. As I reached for one, I looked up and recognized the waiter. It was someone I had not seen for two years since we took a class together. It took me a moment to recognize him because it was so out of context – when I knew him he was working in real estate. We started to talk and reconnect until he reminded me that he was working, which I had completely forgotten. It turns out he was also our server at the dinner reception – the Universe clearly did the seating chart, given that there were over 30 tables and we just “happened” to have him. I introduced him to my friends, involved him in our conversation and gave him a huge hug as the dinner ended.
The next morning I received an unexpected email from him in which he shared how hard the last year had been for him after a self-destructive impulse that lead to losing a lot of money. At the end of the email he wrote, “All I can do is thank you for your smile and your warmth. Your eyes didn’t judge my recent status, but just saw me as me. And as you saw me, it made it easier to see myself. That’s a true gift. Thank you.”
My soul saw my old friend. I did not judge him for what he was doing, where he had been or where he was headed. It was possible for me to see him this way because one of my most important spiritual practices is to see others and myself without judgment. (And I say “practice” because it is definitely an ongoing practice!)
I can recall so many times in my life where others, be it strangers or people close to me, have truly seen me through eyes of love. As they have seen me this way, it has made it easier for me to see myself through eyes of love.
Do you see through eyes of judgment or love?
If you want to make a difference in the world, see others differently. If you want to make a meaningful contribution to the world, contribute more love than judgment.
Each moment that we see through eyes of love, it creates a ripple effect . . . and the ripple starts with you. You’ve heard of the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I like to add: And do unto yourself as you would have others do unto you. In other words, give yourself the gift of judgment-free sight. Trust me, the view is much better! Criticizing yourself is a waste of your energy and reinforces the illusion of separateness.
Truly seeing others AND yourself through loving eyes is how you create an impact in the world. It may not seem like you are doing anything “big” but remember it’s only your ego that cares about that…your soul knows better. Your soul knows that you are absolutely perfect just the way you are and where you are. You are the difference. You do matter. You are a beautiful contribution to the world.
“The world is full of people that need someone that understands. Can you be that someone today? Can you make the choice to love others back to wholeness?” Joel Osteen
“If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” Mother Teresa
“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” Henry Miller
About the Author:
Christine Hassler left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about…but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. In 2005, she wrote the first guide book written exclusively for young women, entitled 20 Something 20 Everything. Christine’s second book, The 20 Something Manifesto written for men and women stems from her experience coaching twenty-something’s.
Today, she supports individuals as a Life Coach helping clients discover the answers to the questions: “Who Am I, What do I want, and How do I get it?” As a professional speaker, Christine leads seminars and workshops to audiences around the country. She has spoken to over 10,000 college students as well as to conferences and corporations about generational diversity. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about life issues and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked.
Christine is the spokesperson for Zync from American Express and the key resource for their Quarterlife Program which empowers young people to take control of their finances. She also created a life balance curriculum for the Leadership Institute and is a member of Northwestern University’s Council of 100. www.christinehassler.com