Thoughtful Thursday: Not Getting What You Want?

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0033AUSD2013Want to travel and feel like things aren’t going your way to make it happen?  We all get that feeling sometimes of not getting what we want – but sometimes you realize that it’s not about getting what you want, it’s wanting what you’ve got and turning that into a positive.

You can turn travel into a part of your life – just take a look at what’s happening right NOW and it will help you lead your life of wanderlust later!  Check out this week’s Thoughtful Thursday post.

Guest Blog Post by Christine Hassler

If there is something in your life that you want and you are upset you don’t have it, I have good news for you. The good news is that you actually already have it…just perhaps not in the exact form you thought it should come in.

For example, if you are miserable in your job and searching for your purpose, you are probably missing out on opportunities you have right NOW to share your gifts. If you are single and looking for love, you are not fully appreciating all the love you ALREADY have in your life. If you are obsessing about needing more money, you may not be seeing all the ways that you ARE abundant.

We create rules around how things are supposed to show up in order to feel fulfilled. Then our stories about how things “should” look are creating tunnel vision, blind spots, and lots of unnecessary suffering!!!

I invite you to do an exercise to support yourself in really getting this distinction. Take a moment to look around the room and notice everything that is blue. Really look for all shades of blue and create a mental list of the things you see. Maybe the sky through your window, a shade of blue on a pillow, the color blue in a painting, and so on. Great job! Now after you read the next question it is very important to close your eyes immediately after you read it. No cheating! Here is the question: can you mentally list all the things in the room you are in that are brown? When you’re done, open your eyes and come back to reading.

Now look around and see how much brown is in the room that you did not remember initially seeing. You didn’t notice all of these brown things because you were so fixated on looking for the blue. And all those blue things you are obsessed with finding or having are making you blue!

Let go of your attachment to the form.

Stubborn hearts get broken more often – and take longer to heal.

Stop being so convinced that unless something unfolds in a certain way, you will not be able to experience your heartfelt desires. Trust your longings, but don’t always trust what your mind does with them!

I encourage you to ask yourself what fantasies you have conjured up about what your life is “supposed” to look like. If your life is not matching this picture you created sometime in the past, it is time to update your story and truly recognize the gifts of the present.

Your dreams are ALREADY coming true; open your eyes to see them and open your heart to receive them.



About the Author:

Christine Hassler left her successful job as a Hollywood agent at 25 to pursue a life she could be passionate about…but it did not come easily. After being inspired by her own unexpected challenges and experiences, she realized her journey was indeed her destination. In 2005, she wrote the first guide book written exclusively for young women, entitled 20 Something 20 Everything. Christine’s second book, The 20 Something Manifesto written for men and women stems from her experience coaching twenty-something’s.

Today, she supports individuals as a Life Coach helping clients discover the answers to the questions: “Who Am I, What do I want, and How do I get it?” As a professional speaker, Christine leads seminars and workshops to audiences around the country. She has spoken to over 10,000 college students as well as to conferences and corporations about generational diversity. Christine has appeared as an expert on The Today Show, CNN, ABC, CBS, FOX, E!, Style and PBS, as well as various local television and radio shows, speaking about life issues and “Expectation Hangovers®” – a phenomenon she identified and trademarked.

Christine is the spokesperson for Zync from American Express and the key resource for their Quarterlife Program which empowers young people to take control of their finances. She also created a life balance curriculum for the Leadership Institute and is a member of Northwestern University’s Council of 100.

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